Pay, Park, 'n Ride

Oh yeah, they get you coming and going, pun intended. And I agree with the poster's ironic observation that they do nothing to sweeten the deal when it comes to commuting. All you hear is "take mass transit, it's better for traffic, it's better for the environment, blah, blah, blah." But they offer no incentive to do so.

I am counting the days until DeCamp starts blubbering about how they have to increase its fares because of the toll hikes. Why does NJ hate commuters so much?

Actually, the nearby streets of Clifton (by the park, two blocks east) are already filled most weekday mornings with the cars of commuters who arrived too late to use the Allwood lot. So that aspect of the situation is only going to get worse.

But it is outrageous they're going to charge for parking. People who should be commended for taking public transit will instead be (relatively) gouged. And the Allwood lots are simply wide open expanses of asphalt on the weekends. Surely the "high cost" of maintenance of these lots, which I've never heard before were owned by the NJTP despite all my years in Clifton, can and should be absorbed by the income generated by obviously steadily rising ridership on the commuter lines to NYC.

Maybe they will hire a security firm to help out with all of the break-ins at the allwood lot.

Since the lot is handled by the State Police only, it is an easy target for criminals.

There is nothing better than getting off the bus after a long day of work in the city only to find your driver side window smashed in by a criminal.

I am also guessing that the people who made this decision have never actually used this parking lot.

Logistically speaking, the Allwood lots are already overcrowded. There is no way they can add a fee to the lot and expect traffic to flow smoothly in and out because it is already a nightmare.

Maybe they will install those AWESOME payment machines like the North Bergen park n ride. You know, the machines that are constantly broken, freeze up for 5 minutes at a time, and require a person staffed to oversee them because they DO NOT WORK.

Jeez, this sounds like bait and switch somehow! They have raised fares in recent months or years, I'm sure. They should have figured lot maintenance into their budget. How about they raise fares $.05 per passenger and pay for it that way.

sorry to hear about vandalism though; that would give me second thoughts about the whole park & ride thing entirely.

The tipster is right, if they put in a gate at Mother's the traffic to get in will easily back up into Little Falls! pure absurdity!

Parking has been a commodity for decades, NJT is just catching up. $25/mo is cheap compared with what some towns charge for train station parking.

One does reach a saturation point with the cost of everything increasing & new fees appearing out of the blue. It's little wonder that we have an exodus.

Wondering if Clifton Commons will still be free? Would be interesting to see NJT try to man the stop & shop parking lot...

The cost of commuting is shameful. And by the way, DeCamp upped its prices in November, I believe to anticipate the toll hikes.

Sounds like the Allwood lot might introduce one of those low tech parking kiosks where one finds their parking space number on a large metal "mailbox" with numbered slots where one can stuff two crisp, elaborately folded dollar bills inside. They have these machines at Park and Rides in the Boston area. No waits, at least.

Numbers appeared in the Grove Street parking lot for the Newark light rail this weekend as well. It'd be a shame for NJTransit to start charging for those spots as well since more and more people are using the light rail to go to the Rock as well as commuting.

I personally have no problem with the thought of passing on the cost of maintaining these lots to the people who actually use them. The cost of cummuting even with the parking additionis still a huge bargain to actually driving to most locations. While I don't want to shell out more to commute, why should those who don't commute subsidize those who do? (which is exactly what is happening now). If NJ Transit gets too expensive they will lose customers. That's how the free market works.

Agree with the Cheese. The cost associated with the parking facility should be paid by the people that use the lot, otherwise all NJT commuters will bear the cost. Most train riders already pay for parking. Sounds like the users of the Allwood lot got a pretty good deal with the free parking up to now which was subsidized by the NJ Turnpike Authority - hey, weren't we complaining about high tolls just yesterday?

Well, no. The "free market" would work if these were all private companies. Whereas here, as noted, NJ Transit is a quasi-governmental entity. As such, if they get too expensive, don't count on a new, cheaper bus service coming along.

Won't happen.

so now the turnpike will drop their tolls since they no longer pay to maintain the parking lots? yeah when pigs fly.

Prof,
It's still a free market. Commuters are free to use the service or not. Other companies are free to enter the picture. Private companies can't really be competitive (in my opinion)here due to the fact that NJ Transit is not private and spends tax dollars from the state. This further illustrates what a good deal (compared to what a privatized market would charge) we have with NJT. All in all I think its a pretty good system.

Because of state control, other companies are not "free" to enter the picture (via routes used and controlled by NJ Transit).

So, yes (obviously) folks are free to choose, but the question is are companies "free" to enter?

If yes, fairly? No, which you answered by pointing out that NJ Transit is subsidized.

So while it is a good deal, it shows how needed Gov involvement is (here), not how "free" our markets are.

Cheese_with...., a little less assured harshness, please. The point of all the improvements to the lots in Allwood was to attract new riders to the buses. Fine. It worked.

But now they're going to charge these same riders even more for their commitment to public transit, no matter that their appearance in those lots has raised bus ridership figures in general. Not perhaps the wisest move. It smacks of greed, even, is definitely not a good will kind of gesture. We are not talking parking lots with services, after all, merely of expanses of untended asphalt, with nary so much as a rest room, and I really did imagine that the idea was to encourage folks to use public transit, daily commuters and matinee-goers alike.

I'd also hate to think that charging for parking there will similarly encourage Clifton to charge as well for the commuters' cars on its streets, but I suppose it will.

What I remember best about the lot on the south side of Allwood Road was the number of cars there on September 12, then a few less on the 13th, etc. There was something very sad indeed about those still there on the 16th, the forlorn that some of their drivers would never be picking them up.

cathar - the lot may be untended, but there are hard dollar costs associated with leasing the land and maintaining the lot (trash removal, snow removal, grass cutting, lighting, periodic repaving, etc.) One way or another, NJT has to pay the bills - through government funding (our tax dollars), NJT fares (paid by all riders), or parking fees (paid by users of the lot.)

It doesn't seem like greed, but rather a cost allocation decision. And the default seems to be that people have to pay use fees for parking at public transportation hubs. Those of us who need to drive to local train stations can attest to this. Why should Allwood be different?

They have ways of covering costs, let's help the Republicans figure out how: http://youtube.com/watch?v=fH5JchsZwDY&feature=related

If I'm not mistaken, spicoli (anyway, if I'm not at least partially mistaken), municipalities commonly own the land next to train stations, not NJT.

It also happens that NJT has quite a long "tradition" of allowing free parking at major bus interchanges as a way of building bus traffic. Old Bridge (a monster of a lot, on both sides of Route 9, Clifton and Wayne are but three examples. Now, however, with bus business very much on the rise, they announce a plan to charge for parking. At the very least, they couldn't have waited another year or two?

And as someone who lives (and walks to, past all those cars that so far park on neighboring Clifton streets for free) the Allwood lots, I assure you, there isn't that much maintenance ever being done. There's no grass to cut, for example. And relatively little lighting. Trash amounts to one or two cans a day. Don't exaggerate the "costs" here, lest you sound like an NJT bureaucrat tryng his damnedest to justify his own job as an administrator of such an empire of asphalt. I've never had the impression that NJT is exactly a cutting-edge outfit, especially given the lazy idiots it has selling tickets at Port Authority, who smirk beautifully when they close down their ticket lines during rush hour..

Well, no. The "free market" would work if these were all private companies. Whereas here, as noted, NJ Transit is a quasi-governmental entity. As such, if they get too expensive, don't count on a new, cheaper bus service coming along.

Won't happen.

Posted by profwilliams | January 10, 2008 12:37 PM

----------------------------------------------------------

It's already happened. Are you unaware of all the jitney services out of Paterson & Passaic? I imagine that's being replicated in a lot of communities, if not Baristaville. Maybe it's just niche competition as opposed to another bus line, but it still seems to be thriving.

I have a great little spot thats off of allwood road that I have been using for 2 years when the clifton lot is full. Looks like I will be going there full time now.

I wonder if the new regulations they made on allwood road(2 hour parking signs) were coordinated with this?

As far as the lot charges go, something was probably going to give... I knew people from Butler, NJ that used that lot(although they may use the wayne one now)

When I lived in LI, you paid for spots too. You noted your parking space number, went up to the machine, punched in the number, then put in your 2 bucks. Then you got a receipt. Then around 11am, the meter maid come, check what numbers arent paid for and see if there are cars in them. If so they get a ticket.

The free market can not deliver effective services if it is unprofitable. That is why public systems are better suited for public transportation.

Everyone here better get used to the idea of public transportation. I don't think oil prices are going to go down.

http://www.bloomberg.com/apps/news?pid=20601087&sid=ayQXcHVStlP8&refer=home

Geez. What a concept. Pay for the convenience of a commuter parking lot you use for a whopping two bucks a day. Only on this site can something like cheap commuter parking become a reason to bring out the thesaurus and econ 101 books. It's a pretty reasonable fee for parking when compared to other commuter lots in the area.

Everyone here better get used to the idea of public transportation.

Oh, yeah? And what if I don't? What'll you do? Give me a knuckle sandwich?

Mikey, you're neither an economist nor a social critic. (You're also not a sentient being by most folks' standards, but we'll let that one go this time.) So don't try to be one.

But someday (you who seriously suggested "renting" as a means of doing one's part to preseve energy), you might try and explain to the democratically committed among us your fierce insistence on totalitarianism as a means of achieving the "progressive" utopia in America. Every time you offer up suggestions, I note, they are in a repressive, you-better-do-this-or-else vein. Such a would-be tough guy. And since I've seen you in person, laserknothead, I know you're not a tough guy. So why do you continue to post as if your lamebrain ideas are dicta which MUST be obeyed? Been reading "She" lately? You need to try and boss someone around?

Jerseygurl, some might actually think that $2 a day to park in Clifton is rather a big new bite out of their wallets. Particularly against a $4.40 one way fare into Manhattan, that's a hefty percentage.

That you apparently embrace new fees does not constitute a justification for them. Again, the lots for the longest time, probably as a way of building bus ridership, were free. Now that bus ridership is up, the lots will no longer be free. This suggests a certain degree of calculation on the part of NJT. Even as the state government via Corzine pleads poverty, the intent is always to pass new costs on to commuters and citizens in general. I'd suggest that the economic contribution of commuter employment to the New Jersy economy might more than plausibly justify free parking for those wise enough and concerned enough to use public transit. (Though the would-be-tyrannical pipsqueaks like laserboy would probably disagree.) Instead, the state wishes to stick it to them again. Oddly enough, however, you seem quite comfortable with this.

crank,

I am fully aware of the Jitney services (but I LOVE the light rails!). However, as long as NJT heavily regulates, (often) provides the buses and (often) limits service from communities to (NJT) train stations, you do not have a "free market."

So admittedly, there are many Jitney's, but as you say, this is a "niche," rather than a competitive bus service (many jitney's don't even have set schedules).

I have not been so agitated by a commuter issue since I was told by NJTransit that they would not run more buses into and out of Montclair (the 191 near MSU) because that area is heavily serviced by DeCamp.
$300 more per year to ride a bus that lately takes at least 60 minutes from Allwood is depressing. I agree with the first poster--why does NJ hate its commuters so much. I live near the Montclair Height train station so I assumed when I moved to Montclair I would take the train. But the two morning Midtown Direct trains take at least 60-freaking-minutes to go 12 miles and are always late getting in (5-10 minutes) That is absurd. On Metro North, that trip should take 40 minutes, tops. I get that Penn Station has 3 lines coming into it, I'm not a dope. I feel I should feel luckier that I have so many options to get to Manhattan but they all just suck.

The Park & Ride was my saving grace (even with the stress of getting there and hoping there was still a spot at 7:55 a.m.)

My cat, Tubby and I are currently working on a teleportation unit. I've been able to transport Tubby from our bedroom to the basement. Once I can get a fix on our garage, I'll attempt to transport him there.

Once this device is perfected I will be a billionaire and everyone will be able to instantly transport themselves to work.

Say a prayer for the 'Tubbster.

Cathar,

I remember when the "lots" didn't even exist. Then they one day there very small lots atop the long grassy slope down to the GSP. Then they were renovated and became the huge lots they are today. So the people who have been parking there have been getting a pretty good deal since they haven't paid for the signinificant expansion in the number of available spaces. I do not "embrace" the new fees. I am an unbiased observer. I no longer take the bus as I have paid a hefty premium to live close to a train station as well as walking distance to Upper Montclair shops. I completely embrace public transportation. I was merely pointing out that compared to other commuter parking lots, $2.00 is a bargain. Bus and train ridership have increased over the last 10 years because significant numbers of commuters have moved into the area, not because the lots are free. So if anyone has to pay for upkeep of the lots, it should be the people who actually use them. Parking should not be funded by all the other NJT riders nor other tax payers who do not even use the bus.

"You're also not a sentient being" - something a fascist would say. Tell us more about the sub-human enemies within and without.

Walleroo, what are you going to do when you can not afford gasoline? I guess you'll walk.

We ought to gear the state to meet our social and environmental responsibility. One bus could take 20 cars off the road reducing road maintenance costs and reducing carbon emissions. Most first world countries have a well developed public transportation system and America is dragging it feet again. Also, the market is not the end all be all. Public systems can work if you have a functioning political system. We have neither but that is mostly the peoples fault.

Laserlump, you'e calling me a fascist again? Goodie, then all's right with the world.

But you really do smack of totalitarianism, mikeypal. It's a pathetic means of getting noticed here if you're not serious. Alas, I think you are. And no, by any reasonable standard you're neither a sentient being nor one much kindly disposed towards your fellow citizens. Instead, you're a crabbed, flint-hearted sort who usually posts out of sheer loneliness and politicized spite. That you're also a completely hapless dip only compounds the felony of your meanspiritedness.

Jerseygurl, neither of us have any true idea if ridership has increased because the lots are free or simply because new people have moved into the area. There is no such research. But ridership is up, and to keep it up it might well behoove NJT to keep those lots free. Even for occasional usage by those such as yourself who congratulate themselves on their willingness to pay a "premium" to live near a train station. For the less affluent, however, and from observation over the years there are plenty of blue-collar commuters to NYC at Allwood, the new parking charges will prove a bummer. (Would you really prefer them using those, uh, "jitneys" that drive folks to NYC from Paterson? I took one a few times, the driver's road-control skills in each instance were like something displayed by the bus drivers in old Mexican masked wrestlers movies.) That may delight laserboy, but it's still not necessarily a good idea. NJT too has been getting a "pretty good deal" through the last several years, as it's seen its ridership figures increase even as its on-time percentages and customer service generally haven't. The basically nightly delays leaving Port Authority nightly between 5-7PM alone may constitute good reason for the curtailment of the planned parking fees. Appletony's occasional, very convincing paeans here to the delights of driving in and out of Manhattan in his own auto (which he admits is not for the skimpily salaried) should also come to mind as a distinct warning about the wisdom of suddenly charging for bus commuter parking.

As energy prices increase public transportation may be the only option. We can build a public transportation system that we can be proud of.

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/01/11/nyregion/11homeheat.html?pagewanted=1&hp

the two morning Midtown Direct trains take at least 60-freaking-minutes to go 12 miles and are always late getting in (5-10 minutes) That is absurd.

Bingo! Take note, jerseygurl.

One bus could take 20 cars off the road reducing road maintenance costs and reducing carbon emissions.

It seems to me cathar and laserdoodle are on the same side in this particular fight--on the side of government subsidized mass transit. Okay, boys, let's kiss and make up.

As for me, I'm going to hitch a ride in appletony's limo. Hey apple, I'd like to leave this afternoon about 4:30, whaddaya say?

"It seems to me cathar and laserdoodle are on the same side in this particular fight--on the side of government subsidized mass transit."

And me three. I know I sound like a broken record but privately-owned bus companies(such DeCamp) have gone the way of the dinosaur in most big cities. Having all forms of mass transit subsidized would not be a perfect system but it would be a better one.

laser-bama...why don't you go buy yourself a car from Tata.

Oh yes, laserdoodle, rising oil prices mean cars will go the way of the dodo. What a nuanced analysis. Tell that to the billion Indians who'll be buying Tata's new car.

Bodacious Tatas.

I already put in my order for the Bodacious model. Two of 'em.

I just want to mention that when I worked in downtown Newark, my monthly parking fee was $140/month (and had increased steadily in the few years preceding that). Figuring that I used the lot 5 days a week, and had 3 weeks vacation, it was an effective rate of $6/day. I left that job almost 3 years ago so there's no telling what the parking rate is now, my guess is that it's at least $160/mo.

So, $2 per day isn't a huge bite, but it certainly is annoying and probably a symptom of rampant and irresponsible spending. (any bets on whether NJT will now hire some cronies to run the "Park N Ride Maintenance Department, Allwood Division", "Wayne Division", "Old Bridge Division", etc. etc. - so that means are justified?)

p.s. does that model come with porthole windows?

Oh my. The fiscal restraint crowd is pulling an expansion of the public transit entitlement. Don't get me wrong - I like public transit and use it every day. I'm just surprised by the sides that people are taking.

So let's go to the numbers...

NJT is heavily subsidized by federal and state tax dollars. From NJT's 2007 budget:

"The operating budget is primarily funded by passenger and other revenues ($825 million), state and federal reimbursements ($464 million) and state operating assistance ($298 million)."

"The capital budget is primarily funded by the New Jersey Transportation Trust Fund ($625 million), federal sources ($399 million), federal Congestion Management Air Quality and Surface Transportation Program funds ($126 million) and other targeted federal support ($86 million)."

So, half of the $1.6 billion operating budget is funded by federal and state sources. And all of the $1.15 billion capital (i.e. infrastructure) budget is funded by state and federal sources.

Add it all up, and riders pay for 30% of the $2.7 billion spent by NJT last year. If you ask me, the NJT bus riders get the worst deal. I would hazard a guess that bus fares come pretty close to covering the cost of service (NJT doesn't have to pay to build the roads after all). Train systems on the other hand are very expensive to build and maintain, so that $5.50 fare to Penn doesn't come close to covering the cost of service.

The introducing the Tata Nano in India is extremely poor engineering. The car sells for $2500.00 American but what are they going to fuel it with, chutney? The Tata is a grand example of economic, resource, social, and environemental unsustainability.

Mini-CAT car are a much better choice. The runs on compressed air.

"roughly 125 miles for $3. The top speed will be almost 70 mph"

http://rawstory.com/news/2007/Air_car_runs_on_compressed_air_0104.html

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So you want to talk to a scientist on climate change, here is you oppurtunity.

Climate Change in the Northeast
(conference by Union of Concerned Scientists)
Sunday, January 13, 2008
9:00am - 3:00pm
University Hall
Montclair State University
Contact Jean Sideris, Outreach Coordinator
Climate Change Program
jsideris@ucsusa.org
617.301.8032
(continental breakfast and lunch provided)

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Take it to the forums!

...looking at two different futures -- one where we remain heavily reliant on fossil fuels, producing high levels of global warming emissions, and one where we begin to reduce our emissions as individuals, industries, and communities.

Guess what. These very different futures are virtually identical!

The air car is pretty interesting, laserdoodle. We should force Indians to drive them. Perhaps if we invade their country and install a puppet regime, we can bend them to our will.

Guess what. These very different futures are virtually identical!

They also look pretty sweet. I wonder how bad Downeast Mainers would feel about having a Chesapeake Bay climate?

When we're in the zone that unbiased scientist lasermike projects, we will use a lot less heating oil and be able to grow much more food over a longer growing season. It'll be nice to grow cannas, magnolias, bouganvillea and other lush semi-tropicals, too.

Lasermike, is there any way to speed up this warming process that will be so wonderful for the Northeast and Canada?

Walleroo, don't be ridiculous. There is no way in either heaven and hell that laserloon and I would ever be on the same side of anything. (Even the Red Sea when Moses parted it. He, I'm positive, would have been in Pharoah's army, chasing after us Israelites for the environmental waste of our just-concluded Pasch.))

Mikey also seems happy that a car which runs on compressed air will hit (for a brief while, anyway) 70 mph.

Laserboy, back in the glory days of high-test and muscle cars, 70 was the ante. Not the desired mark to reach occasionally. Grow up here.

(There is, as it happens, a cherry-red '57 Chevy with a rebuilt engine and white tuck-and-roll leather upholstery which I recently saw for sale parked on US17 on John's Island, SC, for just $1900. Would that I could do something more mechanically involved than just change sparkplugs...... Anybody want to go halfsies? Walleroo? Appletony? Profwilliams?)

Sounds nice, but my tiny driveway is maxed out with two cars (neither of which is particularly big, contrary to walleroo's limo theory).

Cathar, disagrees with me on principal.

God parted the sea for the children of Abraham. Who do you belong to?

God, laserdoofus, since He is the First Principle, never has to stand on "principal."

But I assume He also takes care of the poor and truly mingy in spirit, as indicated in the Beatitudes. Hence your own continued existence as the local version of the village idiot, mikeypal.

And no one wants half of a '57 Chevy? Come on, guys, once you sit in it, as I did, it's always a soft summer night in 1962 inside and the AM-only radio is playing the top 40 as determined by the WMCA "Good Guys" and the car virtually noses itself right on down to the nearest drive-in (which is a Sonic car-hop outlet about 10 miles away on the road to Folly Beach) and orders its own black-and-white shakes, cheeseburger and onion rings while beeping flirtatiously at the cheerleaders in the Rambler station wagon three slots over...

I'm saving up for a JetPack so I can fly myself to the Hudson River. Last time I paid a monthly fee, in Jersey City, it was $240 a month. That was a car payment! So now I have a nice cozy ride with my peeps on the PATH and the Newark Light Rail and NJ Transit bus and ... finally, my own car!

Only if it's a convertible. Spring is coming, and I am not ready for it.

walleroo's theory of appletony's limo:

1. There exists a man named appletony who prefers to commute by car because it is a) convenient, b) quick and c) hastens global warming, which appletony apparently approves of probably because he thinks it will lead to the Second Coming.

2. Appletony possesses the following characteristics: a) he's very, very fat; b) he is never seen without a cigar in his mouth; and 3) his idea of a good time is reading legal treatises on the virtues of the death penalty.

3. Being encumbered by his large size and his propensity to read exceedingly large documents, and because he never is heard complaining about traffic, which means he couldn't have first hand knowledge of the drive into and out of manhattan, it must therefore be true that....

4) appletony is driven in a white stretch limo with christmas tree lights on the fenders.

Tomorrow we'll think up an experiment to test this theory.

I was kind of thinking that appletony's car has steer horns mounted on the hood, and that the horn plays "Deep in the heart of Texas."

When he drives by, he of course fires his waterpistol at helpless walleroo in his battered, puffing Citroen and laserboy in his non-polluting pedicab with the isulated box behind his butt so he can get his pizzas home still warm.

According to walleroo and cathar, appletony must bear a remarkable resemblance to Boss Hogg!

What if you're both wrong? What if appletony is really some scrawny sort in an Armani suit, balding on top but with a little ponytail whipping back as he barrels down Route 3 in his mid-life crisis Miata? What if, while barreling, he's yammering in his cell phone to his underpaid and overworked (and sexually harassed) underlings back at the office, demanding that they properly collate the files he's putting together for his cases, and instructing them to make luncheon appointments at Balthazar's.
If so, he'd be more like the lawyers I've known! The alternative version has him sounding like some sort of cracker Suge.

I like the steer horns heart of texas theory, cathar, but if true then he must also wear a 10 gallon hat and wear shit kickers.

I somehow can't see appletony in a Miata--though perhaps a Porsch 911--but what do I know.

What if it's walleroo who really either looks as croiagusanam has theorized about appletony or like Boss Hogg, right down to the rumpled white linen suit with peace cobbler and "sweet tea" stains on it?

Then, gentlemen, we are all in the soup.

OK. But what does lasermikey llok like?

Maynard G. Krebs, marooned on an island on the internet.

Although I have in fact met the laserlad, croiagusanam, obviously anything I'd offer up via a physical description would be colored by my view of him as a peculiar blend of the village idiot, a wratherful loner muttering resentfully in his garret that "the world shall hear from me again!!!" and Yosemite Sam at his sputtering worst. So I'll restrict my own version of Mikey in the flesh to extreme skepticism that, as he once claimed, he could ever have been recruited by the military (of this country, not of either Iran or Chechnya) for OCS and come as near to that as he's said he did. If only because I doubt very much he'd make the minimum height requirement.

There are, however, pictures of him on the archives of this very site from the one time Baristanet had a party. It was, I believe, sometime in the early spring of 2006, but anyway they ran here.

And now back to the Giants game...

Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale,
A tale of a nitwit post.
That started from this network port
aboard this tiny thread.

The mate was a mighty lefty man,
the right wing brave and sure.
Five contributors set sail that day
for a three hour tour, a three hour tour.

The postings started getting rough,
the tiny thread was tossed,
If not for the courage of the fearless few
the subject would be lost, the subject would be lost.

The thread was ground on this un-moderated net blog
With laser boy
The cathar too,
The walleroo and his pouch,
The rest of us.
The professor and Ms. Marta,
Here on Baristanet.

So this is the tail of the regulars,
They're here for a long, long time,
They'll have to make the best of things,
It's an uphill climb.

The laser boy and the cathar too,
Will do their very best,
To make the others comfortable,
In the topic of the thread.

No sense, no facts, no diplomacy,
not a single consistency,
Like pre-school enlightenment,
As primitive as can be.

So join us here each week my friends,
you're sure to get a smile,
from many stranded castaways,
Here on "Baristanet."

Photos of some Baristanet denizens appear here.

That you write doggerel, Y.A. Duck, is surely much to your credit. Next time, however, you might also wish to provide some real point to all your words.