Obama Sweeps Weekend, Hillary Makes Changes

She also continues to put Bill's foot in her mouth.

She's going down fast.

Equal time? Where's the McCain video?

The McCain video has the troops going door to door in Baghdad to the tune of REM's "The Great Beyond."

Note to Hillary - please go away.

Hate to have to put it this way, but man, could that music be any whiter? (NB: That's not a compliment.)

Click here for the McCain video: http://www.youtube.com/user/Election08

That can't be for real. Must be a right wing conspiracy.

Ya think?

Maybe Amy Winehouse will make a video for him.

Yea, that song is part of her racial polarization strategy. It is the Jackson Five's "ABC 123," but with white ladies singing in aisles of Walmart. What a backfire.

Oy. She should stick to Fleetwood Mac.

Hillary for you and me
Makes want to up and flee
It won't give me any thrill
To grit my teeth four years with Bill.

Bloody retching hell. Somebody spent money on this. This is a spoof of a bad jingle, right? That can't be sanctioned by her campaign. I gotta figure some lame commercial composer somewhere out in the fly-overs threw this together thinking it would get him or her some attention.

walleroo,

Years ago, perhaps your comment could get a laugh, but today it is offensive.

Imagine if one were to suggest that Obama's video was particularly Black?...

and profwilliams's post to walleroo is a spoof of a baristavillian over-reaction.

I despise Hillary, but as a Merle Haggard fan rather like his "Te Deum" to her called, of course, "Hillary." And given that it's a country song, walleroo, yes, it is fairly "Caucasoid" in nature.

sleepy,

The prof has no problem thinking and reacting for himself.

No spoof, friend. Just like how when I was a kid, the term "fag" was heard all the time, I won't stand for it now.

Over-reaction?

Or do you believe that the last group we can happily make fun of is White folks generally (but not to call out a specific ethnic group)?

Yes, I believe that we can happily make fun of white folks generally, especially when it comes to music. As far as calling out specific ethnic groups, i avoid it, though I have no problem with mocking the French, the Belgians and the Brits.

Nothing funnier than acknowledged racism hiding behind humor...

Do you teach your children that they can freely joke about White folks? (They won't last in my class...)

But how do you explain which group they can make fun of?

Alas, I guess I have to understand that we are at a place where folks love to flaunt their stupidity.

So I'll let your reply speak for itself.

So it's no longer okay to make fun of white guys trying to dance, replete with "white man's overbite"?

Aw come on, i was kidding. My mom is Belgian. And my children aren't allowed to make fun of anyone in the human race. Only animals. But they're not allowed to put head-gear on the animals; they may only demean them verbally.

prof, far be it from me to stir the pot but, are you not the same prof who only weeks ago was singing the praises of Jeff Foxworthy? Does he not "freely" make fun of white people, generally? Unless of course you consider rednecks to be an ethnic group. At the same time, does Chris Rock hesitate to make fun, "generally", of both white and black people?
A little consistency might be nice.

Oh snap.

Ooh, wait -- prof, something just occurred to me: is the REAL reason you're suddenly taking such umbrage ... that you were somehow involved in the making of that dippy video?? Hmmmm? Did you pen that lyric? Did you write those horn charts? did you choreograph those fabulous steps? Is this your fabulous creation? Own up, man!

A Belgian sits down at a sidewalk cafe in France, and orders a beer. The waiter brings him a beer and a coaster.
Some minutes later, the Belgian orders another beer. When the waiter brings it, he notices that the coaster is gone, so he replaces it with a new one.
A few minutes later, the Belgian calls for another beer. The waiter notices that again, the coaster is gone, so he simply leaves the beer with no coaster.
"Hey", the Belgian cried out, "Where's my cookie?"

"Well, I'm a redneck woman,
I ain't no high-class broad,
Just a product of my raisin',
I say, 'Hey ya'll' and 'yeehaw'
I keep my Christmas lights on
on my front porch all year long.
And I know all the words
to every Tanya Tucker song
So this one's for my sisters
For keeping it country,
Let me get a big "hell yeah!"
for the redneck girls like me,
'Hell yeah!"

cro,

And you don't see how both Foxworthy and Rock (Comedians...) use race to make their point?

This is unlike how sleep used it here.

But perhaps you felt fine using the N-word after Rock made it "cool", huh?

MONTY PYTHON on Belgians and racism (I love when topics jibe like this)...

"Well now, the result of last week's competition when we asked you to find a derogatory term for the Belgians. Well, the response was enormous and we took quite a long time sorting out the winners. There were some very clever entries. Mrs Hatred of Leicester Said 'let's not call them anything, let's iust ignore them'. And a Mr St John of Hurtfingdou said he couldn't think of anything more derogatory than Belgians. But in the end we settled on three choices: number three...the Sprouts, sent in by Mrs Vicious of Hastings... very nice; number two....the Phlegms, from Mrs Childmolester of Worthing; but the winner was undoubtedly from Mrs No-Supper-For-You from Norwood in Lancashire ... Miserable Fat Belgian Bastards. Very good - thank you."

some non-racial humor:

Three contractors are going to bid on a new sign for City Hall, one from Cape May, one from Rutheford and one from Montclair. They meet with the township official to measure the old sign.

The Cape May contractor takes out a tape measure does a series of measurements, scratches some figures onto a note pad and says, "Well, I figure the job ought to run you $900. $400 for materials, $400 for my crew and $100 profit for me."

The contractor from Rutheford says "I can do it for $700. $300 for materials, $300 for my crew and $100 for me."

The Montclair contractor doesn't do any measuring or figuring and leans over to the township official and whispers "$2700".

Sounding incredulous, the official says, "You didn't even measure anything! How did you come up with that figure?!"

The Montclair contractor whispers back, "$1000 for me, $1000 for you and we'll hire the guy from Rutheford to make the sign."

"Done!" replies the township official.

Cro -

Years ago, perhaps your comment could get a laugh, but today it is offensive.

prof, first, it was walleroo who used it, and to whom you directed your initial objection.
Second, he too used it in a comic context -- one needn't have a HBO deal in order to be a "comedian".

(in walleroo's case you would, cro.)

A shifty looking guy in a kilt walks into a london pub, orders a pint & very, very
carefully puts down the plastic bag he is carrying.
The bartender asks "What's that?"
The guy answers "6 pounds of semtex"
"Thank christ for that" says the barman,
"I thought it might be bagpipes."

ROC, years ago, that joke would have gotten a laugh.
Today, it is simply factual.

Yeah, what cro said. Though let's not assume that Walleroo doesn't have an HBO deal. You never know around here.

What does a Canadian say when you step on his foot?

"Sorry."

The only deal walleroo has with HBO amounts to $19.95 per month.

The bagpipes joke is priceless.
I'm seeing you in a whole new light, ROC.

Sorry, sleep.

But the point remains.

Cro, if I make an Irish/Drunk joke, while not a comedian with a deal, that's okay?

Ah, no.

And that's the point, here.

Simply saying, "hey, no offense, I was being funny..." is not good enough anymore.

But if you roll with racist humor, great. But when I hear it, I speak to it.

A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink.
"Why of course," comes the reply.
The first man then asks: "Where are you from?"
"I'm from Ireland," replies the second man.
The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland."
"Of Course," replies the second man.
Curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?"
"Dublin," comes the reply.
"I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin."
"Of course," replies the second man.
Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?"
"Saint Mary's," replies the second man. "I graduated in '65."
"This is unbelievable!," the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '65, too!"
About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar.
"What's been going on?," he asks the bartender.
"Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Malley twins are drunk again."

How can you get 100 Canadians out of the pool on the hottest day of the year?

Yell "Ok now, everyone out of the pool!"

MM,

I'm Irish (25%) and take offense at your joke, that is, unless you have a deal with HBO, then I think it's pretty funny!

;)

All well and good, prof, but your distractions don't work on me -- you have yet to confirm or deny your creative involvement in that dorky video.

(And since you're a professor, can you explain why i get a spelling error red-line on the word "dorky?")

prof, if you go to Ireland (and please let me know if you do, for I have some wonderful spots for you to visit), you will find that EVERYBODY makes Irish/drunk jokes, and they by and large love them. Unless, of course, you tell folks that you don't like those kinds of jokes. In that case, they will honour your request, unless they're drunken eejits!
The point is intent. That's what you don't seem to get. You most certainly can say things about your own group without having the joke police called out. The fact that you would call this racist tells me that you have avery curious definition of same.
But I know that I feel better now that you're out there "speaking to" "racist" jokes.

WOW, that's bad. I ithink they need a DJ to scratch over it.

Does being engaged to an Irishman count? :-)

If anyone knows any good Norwegian (Ugland - 25%) or Scottish(Lothian - 50%) jokes I'm all ears

cro,

It's obvious you just don't get it...

If a member of a group, you get a pass and can joke (usually with your "peoples"), so I don't really care about Irish folks in Ireland making Irish jokes.

Hell, I don't have to go that far to see that.

The point is making those jokes outside of that group (like a public blog...).

And considering how difficult this simple idea is for you, I also feel better having spoken to it.

An elderly spinster is living in the village in which she grew up. She has never had a date, and other than a small heart problem several years ago, she is in perfect health. Each evening, after supper, she walks a mile into town and has a small sherry at the pub, before walking home and going to bed.
One night, she notices a man of a certain age giving her the eye. The next night, he's there agin, and he sends a drink over. On the third night, he joins her, and they spent hours chatting and getting on splendidly. As the barman calls out, "Time, folks, please", he asks if he could walk her home. She consents.
They stroll home through the soft evening, laughing and talking of everything under the sun. When they arrive at her door, she asks him in for a cup of tea. As they sit on the sofa, he makes a move to put his arm around her shoulder, and she allows it. He begins to gently kiss her neck, and she is getting terribly flustered.
"Just a minute, now", she says. "Before we go any further, I want you to know that I have acute agina."
"Well, good", says your man, "That'll make up for them saggy tits!"

sleep,

I only forwarded the video- I'll take no credit for its content.

And I don't understand that other part of your post....

prof, so many people "don't get" you that it might behoove you to consider that there is really nothing to get.

I almost spit out my drink with that one! Good one!

Thanks to "Prairie Home Companion"...

How can you tell a norwegian extrovert?

he looks at the toes of YOUR shoes while he talks to you.

******

Fire fighters are fighting a bar fire. When they manage to get the fire under control they start there investigation and find an old Irish man alive siting at the bar all burned up with his glass melted to his hands. When the firefighters ask him how the fire started the Old irish man replied " I don't know it was burning when I got here.

*******

A Polish immigrant walks into the DMV to get a driver's license. First he had to take the eye exam. The optician shows him a chart on the wall with the letters CZWIXNOSTACZ. "Can you read this?" the optician asked. "Read it?" replied the Polish man, "I know the guy!".

"the point is making those jokes outside of that group (like a public blog)"
Or, presumably, a HBO special, YouTube clip, or Spike Lee joint.

cro,

Funny how you write that on a post credited to me.

Oh, well. I'll just have to continue my sorry way of getting folks to get me... (or something like that, since I had to read your post a few times before I think I understood what you were getting at. Typical.)

prof, trying to plow through your tortured syntax is right up there with root canal in terms of fun.
Why not just stay on post, "speaking to" racism. At least, until your relief gets here.

So... Walleroo disparaged the music in the video with the expression "could that music be any whiter?" If we buy prof's dictum that you get a pass for joking about your own people, then the comment wasn't racist IF walleroo is white (under his marsupial fur).

and Prof, sorry if you didn't understand my other question. It's unrelated to the rest of this conversation. I was distracted because when i typed the word "dorky" this computer gave me the red-dotted underline, to a misspelling. but i can't think of any other way to spell 'dorky.' so i figured an academic like you could help out on that front.

From Wiki:

"The adjectival form of dork is dorky, a word that was mainstream enough by 1971 to appear in a Peanuts comic strip.[2]"

Thanks cro, but I won't be needing any word/grammar/style help from you, friend.

However, you might want to research the use of "ing" to understand why I use the term, "Speak To."

(But as I've stated, since I called you out a few months ago, your writing has improved. I guess you were just being lazy.)

Sleep, I believe MM has helped. Perhaps the software used by Baristanet here, didn't check Wiki.

prof, I know why you use the term. It is called pretension, and you have it to the nth degree.
As far as style/grammar, etc. goes, don't look to me for help (though I do understand why you would look for assistance). I haven't set myself up as a maven, and don't look to make myself look clever by uncovering misspellings, etc. in a blog. That is a pastime for folks who need to remind others of their erudition, since it is so often called into question.
I'm glad to hear that you still think you "called " me. That's amusing.

cro,

I'm so hurt....

WOW. prof is clever.

But have you dumbed down "clever" so much that you see understanding knowing basic grammar as "clever"?

clever?

There hasn't been anything clever in this thread for an hour and fifty minutes.

An English professor wrote the words, “A woman without her man is
nothing” on the blackboard and directed the students to punctuate it
correctly.

The men wrote: “A woman, without her man, is nothing.”

The women wrote: “A woman: without her, man is nothing.”

Which brings us right black to the Clintons! Nice segue!

E=Mc2

Whoa, "right back." That was one helluva typo.

Bill and Hillary are vacationing in Hillary's home town and stop at a gas station to gas up. The attendant comes out and fills up their car and when he leans over to collect the money he and Hillary recognize one another and begin making small talk.

When they finally leave Bill asks her who she was talking to and she says it was her first boyfriend from back in high school.

Bill says that's nice and asks her, "Do you ever think about what life would be like if things had been different and you would have married him instead of me?"

To which Hillary responds, "Yes I do, you would be pumping gas and he would be president."

prof, do you "understand basic grammar"?
I hadn't noticed.
I'm sorry of you're hurt. Sometimes, laughter can ease the pain. Perhaps some Foxworthy?
Now, I must duck out of this thread. I just got word that someone in Tierney's told a Polish joke, and I'm going to "speak to" it.

Cro learned a new phrase! Good for you old boy. Now you won't sound so old.

Yeesh. Irish jokes? On an Obaba thread? What's next?

PS
That video was nightmarishly bad.

Irish jokes? On an Obaba thread?

Indeed: O'Bama!

Aye, 'twas a typo, Apple O'Tony

(They won't last in my class...)

Busted! The prof is indeed a prof.

Since nobody knows what race I am under my copious fur, I suppose nobody, by the prof's logic, know whether I'm a creepy racist bastard or just another white guy dissing his own peeps.

O'Baba Reilly?

Walleroo-

"By my logic" you mean the intent not to offend?

Wow. First correct grammar is clever and now not offending someone is logic.

Would he put his hand over his heart for this flag? (on the wall of his HQ in Dallas, about 30 seconds into the video).

Do they send you one free with a donation appletony?

(the above post was meant to be 80% funny and 20% critical, but in a fun "ribbing" sort of way...)

and the above post is 95% accurate. (+/- 10%)

Of course he would.

(But really, why is that flag there?... Whoops! I guess I'm engaging in "that" kind of politics...)

The prof's logic:

If a member of a group, you get a pass and can joke

Oh, what a pain to have to be consistent, innit, prof? It hurts to have to think so hard, dunnit?

Actually, come to think of it, prof, I'm an African American dude, and therefore a racist, creepy bastard for making that remark about "white" music. But now I can say whatever I want about the brothers...

Just kidding! I'm really a native American who also happens to be a Jew... ooops, sorry, Jewish person! Just think of all the Indian rabbi jokes I can make! And did I tell you I recently converted to Roman Catholicism?

A rabbi, a priest and a medicine man were walking down the street...

(The preceding posts were 50 percent joking, 35 percent offensive and 15 percent witless.)

walleroo,

While I find you amusing sometimes, here your jokes hide the simple fact that you chose to use racial insensitive language.

So joke on friend, your words have already got you cornered.

And pegged.

(Moreover, don't be so dumb as to "understand" my words as being that all folks in all groups get a pass-- especially on an anonymous blog.)

Two Irishmen were digging a ditch accross from a brothel, and one noticed a Rabbi walk into the place. One said to the other, "It's a sad day when men of the cloth walk into a place like that." After a little while, the other man saw a minister walk into the brothel. He stood up and said to his partner, "Did ya see that? It's no wonder the children today are so confused with the example that the clergy are settin' for them." After about another hour, the first man saw a Catholic preist walk in. He promptly stood up and proclaimed to his partner. "Aw that is truely sad. One of the poor lassies must be dyin'."

prof, I'm drawn back into the thread only because yours is a heartbreaking cry for help. I'll simplify it for you.
See, I didn't say that correct grammar was clever. I said that I wasn't the sort to try to make myself look clever by correcting grammar. See, the key word there is "seem". You try to make yourself look clever, but in fact you really come off as a windbag and a not terribly smart one at that. Your ability to follow a thread is really not all that impressive. (Oh, I can hear it now. "Cro, your point isn't clear, etc. etc., so's your old man, did not, can too, and on and on and on")
Now, I do hope that has helped, for I don't have the time to fill in the gaps that were left all those years ago during your formative years.
I do have a question, though. A good friend of mine is Mexican and Peruvian. He wants to know if he may safely joke about Aztecs, Incas, both, or neither. Please advise.

Hillary Clinton and her driver were cruising along a country road. One evening when an ancient cow loomed in front of the car.

The driver tried to avoid it but couldn't - the aged bovine was struck and killed.

Hillary told her driver to go up to the farmhouse and explain to the owners what had happened.

She stayed in the car making phone calls to lobbyists.

About an hour later the driver staggered back to the car with his clothes in disarray.

He was holding a half-empty bottle of expensive wine in one hand, a rare, huge Cuban cigar in the other, and was smiling happily, smeared with lipstick.

"What happened to you?," asked Hillary.

"Well," the driver replied, "the farmer gave me the cigar, his wife gave me the wine, and their beautiful twin daughters made mad passionate love to me.!"

"My God, what did you tell them?" asked Hillary.

The driver replied, "I just stepped inside the door and said, I'm Hillary Clinton's driver and I've just killed the old cow.
The rest happened so fast I couldn't stop it."

Laughing out loud! Ha!

A prosperous English businessman is looking out of the window of his gorgeous corner office in London. He notices a panel van pull up across the street, declaring the vehicle to be the property of "O'Brien and Sons, Landscapers". Two navvies tumble out and set to work, one digging deep holes up and down the kerbline, while the man behind him just as vigorously fills them in. This goes on for four hours, with the men working feverishly non-stop. Finally, they take a break, resting on their shovels. The Englishman races downstairs and confronts the two.
"I say", he offers. "I've never seen two men work so hard in my life. Quite impressive. But I must ask, what exactly are you doing?"
"Well, sirr,", says Pat, the man digging the holes, "'Tis true we're working extra hard today. Usually we'd have Mickey right behind me planting the trees, but shure and he's sick today."

Murphy told Quinn that his wife was driving him to drink. Quinn thinks he's very lucky because his own wife makes him walk.

Paddy was driving down the street in a sweat because he had an important meeting and couldn't find a parking place. Looking up to heaven he said, "Lord take pity on me. If you find me a parking place I will go to Mass every Sunday for the rest of me life and give up me Irish Whiskey". Miraculously, a parking place appeared. Paddy looked up again and said, "Never mind, I found one."

This thread (other than some of the funny jokes) has just deteriorated to the Seinfeld episode where his dentist converts just to be able to tell the jokes. (Top 10 episode IMO) Amazing how you can take the last two words of the heading and go from there.

TOP TEN REASONS FOR BEING DUTCH

1. You can get arrested for growing plants, but not for smoking them.
2. You can make jokes about the Belgians and still drink their beer.
3.a. You can legally kill yourself
3.b. You can legally be killed
4. You're exactly like the Germans, except that nobody hates you.
5. You think you are a world power, but everyone else thinks Copenhagen is your capitol.
6. You get to insult people and defend yourself by saying it's a national tradition.
7. You can put your finger in a dyke and it will save your country
8. You live in the most densely populated country in Europe, and still you've never seen your neighbours.
9. If the economy is bad, blame the Germans. If a war is started, blame the Germans. If you lose your keys, blame the Germans.
10.Bikes are public property. Locks are a challenge.

FULL DISCLOSURE: I am of 1/4 Dutch ancestry.

Next up: a Scotsman on a horse.

Good move, prof. Don't even try and cogitate the issue at hand. You'll only hurt yourself. And besides, with the title of professor already in hand, you have nothing to gain from trying to think and everything to lose. Such as your reputation here as an intellectual heavyweight.

And don't think you get off being able to make Dutch jokes, crank. The prof has just rescinded his earlier opinion that it's all right to make fun of your own. So lay off the Dutch, or I'll have to send cathar to kick your ass.

As 50% Dutch I congratulate you crank (the other 50% wants you dead) for a very funny (we're watching) post. But of coarse you're wrong.

If only Mr. Roo could read.....

He'd see how he seems to be railing against what was not said.

But don't let that stop you.

Rant on, Dear friend.

crank, walleroo,
Jaren geleden dat zou geweest zijn grappig.
Nu het is slechts aanvallend.

I think we all have suffered enough, crog, especially from bad prose.

Ben ik gek? Of heeft de prof dit zeggen: Als lid van een groep, krijg je een pasje en kan grap.

It may be a bad translation, Y.A., but it is simple prose. It simply means that, years ago, that might have been funny. Now, it is simply offensive.
Words by which I try to live.

walleroo, that's what he said all right. That pass is yours, so run with it!

posted without comment

Ya'll to sensitive.
What's funny is funny.
To say there are no differences in genetics and "upbringing" is insulting in one context and prejudice in the other.
To point out those differences without rancor and with a point of human nature is humor, all the better if slapstick.
Judgment based on looks (or origin, or accent, whatever stereotypes) is just plain wrong.
To combine them into one subject is just plain stupid.

Bedankt, Cro Magnon mens. Nu moet ik alleen nog om te beslissen welke ras en etniciteit ik ben.

of soorten

of misschien wat soorten

Just so's the prof feels comfy
not me

Waarom zouden we ooit weer in Enligh blog? Nederlands is de weg!

Dat is gemakkelijk!
U bent een BADASS!

Walleroo, I would never be your enforcer. Try to remember that. Your life's bane, maybe, but never your ecorcheur.

Having met many Dutch people in my day, I can safely assert that most seem to absolutely lack a sense of humor, particularly about their own national foibles. (They do, however, seem to enjoy jokes about passing gas for some weird reason.) And when they scoot off to the lquor store to "replace" your boutique beers which they guzzled up, they commonly return with Budweiser or Coors, not even with Heineken.

True, ik heb een zeer slechte kont.

"And when they scoot off to the liquor store to "replace" your boutique beers which they guzzled up, they commonly return with Budweiser or Coors, not even with Heineken."

LOL, this sounds like a lot like many of my friends, of ALL ethnicities!

{{{{Psst! My fiance actually likes Bud. How can we convince him that it's garbage?}}}}

See, cather got the idea. Playing on the stereotype with an absurd connotation, add a classic switch at the end and...Joke.

I would think a man of the people such as yourself, cathar, would prefer Bud or Coors to those highbrow beers so beloved in Baristaville.

MM,

Don't try to change him.

You can't.

So, enjoy the fact that your man likes the King of Beers. Nothing wrong with that.

I don't want to *convert* him, Prof. I just don't understand it. We're going to have a mixed marriage, I guess. Me, a Guinness woman, marrying a Bud man. What will our families think?

{{{{Psst! My fiance actually likes Bud. How can we convince him that it's garbage?}}}}

You can't - its medically impossible. I'm pretty certain whatever chemical additive they put in it which causes those horrible Bud hangover headaches, is the same thing that keeps 'em coming back like crack.

Ugh....

Are we going to start naming our favorite microbrew that no one has heard of to show how great our taste is?

Me? I still crave a fruity Seagram's wine cooler!!

But I'm sure not as cool as most folks here...

Admit it will, ripple and colt 40's. (I know it was really mad dog 20/20, but I didn't want to embarrass you.)